Posts
We’ve got it all wrong… or have we?
I know that you cannot begin a business without the risk of going into a financial loss, you cannot have a baby without the risk of it not coming out healthy or sometimes you not being alive to see it,
… or love without the risk of getting hurt … No, everything is not as morbid as it probably is sounding here, but these are the facts of life on earth, which each of us has to deal with at some point, and sometimes with more than a pinch of salt.
But this thing about love, is something that has been bothering me and seriously making me angry and restless for a very long time.
Why is it that the heart desires what is can’t have? When someone loves you, you end up asking yourself, why?.. Is it my money? My persona? My success?
Or even worse; you question that silly one that loves you? Their reasons.. Is it their insecurity? Their own incompleteness? Their need for attachment?
Did you ever ask your parents why they love you? Did you ask them why do they call you so much? Why they want you to be in front of their eyes as much as you can? Do they ever ask you why you want from them all the time? If are you with them because you feel incomplete or haven’t yet succeeded? Or why do you put your head in your mothers’ lap cry… are you that insecure?
Love for a person not of the same blood can be like that too. Is it not? Otherwise why would you create a child with such a person? Imagine your child asking you, “so you gave me birth because you felt incomplete without me?” the answer is no, and yes. No, because the child wasn’t even there for you to feel incomplete without it and yes, because you feel complete in a marriage once your beautiful child arrives, and then just like that, in one moment, you feel like it was always there, even before you possibly. Isn’t that incredible? Brings a smile to your face, but not funny, I say!
Going back to what I wanted to talk to you about (I tend to get carried away), love (just one of the emotions I get carried away with), is something of such beauty and simplicity and yet so complicated that we spend all our lives looking for answers we, more often, do not find and end up feeling dejected and miserable. Oh my God, we reach out for books to teach us how to, how much to and when to love or not!
We have all been in love, been stupid, gotten carried away, given it our all, been used, cheated, betrayed, have lost, suffered loneliness, fallen in love again, but we never cease to put up this brave front. We try so hard to appear ‘in control’ of our feelings, playing hard to get, be unavailable, run away from the one who loves us truly because we feel overwhelmed, fill our life and time with other things (you do realize they are still ‘other’ things, test that silly wide eyed one’s love for us over and over again, trying to convince them that it’s not really love just some attraction, some attachment…
And all why? Because they were honest enough to tell you how they feel? Brave enough to care how you’d react and still not care enough that it will change how they feel? Running the risk of being accused of wearing their heart on their sleeve because they’ve loved before? … As if you haven’t.
When all we really want is for someone to love us warts and all, and someone we can hold, feel safe enough to be held by, someone we can cry and laugh with, fight and make up with, think and decide with, fail and succeed with, sleep and wake up with, isn’t it?
Love is not to be measured, not to be compared, it doesn’t have reason, it doesn’t come with an expiry date. Unfortunately the human body of the person, who loves you, does.
I see everyone looking for this sort of or that sort of a person. I do too. My sort has to be the sharing, loving, caring, trusting, honest and silly sort. What is your sort?
Why judge a person’s love for you by their achievements and accomplishments? You mean to tell me that a person successful in their job is sure to make a successful companion? Or just because I don’t have time for love, as a result, time for you, as much I have time for other things it means I’m the one who’s truly desirable?
So you love the one who doesn’t love you. You want the one, who doesn’t want you. You need the one who doesn’t need you.
Whatever happened to just loving… and being loved? Showering your special one with attention without having to be answerable for it? Telling someone you love them without having a long list of logical and practical reasons for it?
Why does that person need you to become this or that before you can be part of their life, and then when you do try to do that they ask you why you want to do this for them (with such wonder… as if they don’t know) and then ask you to do it for yourself (so that their guilt is less), Haha! And even so, it is not even close to enough.
I’m not here to have a mudslinging game. We are all; the ones in love, the one’s running away from it, the ones running after it, and even the ones pretending that it doesn’t exist or even if it does, it can’t be the most important thing in life; wasting our intelligence, our emotions and our time.
Love is the one and single most important thing in life. It is the most beautiful emotion. It is to be given and received and returned with more so that even more comes back to you. So that you may, while you are on this lovely planet, create and share incredible experiences the warmth of which the entire world can feel.
Just love… I promise you, not that difficult…
P.S.: if you think I’m wrong, go soak your head… ;) kidding...
If you think I’m lecturing, I hope you learn something from it…
If you think I’m being repetitive, continue the trend… read this 10 times a day, you’ll believe it.
If you hear any honesty in it, just smile and allow it to sink in.
P.P.S: I love you.
I know that you cannot begin a business without the risk of going into a financial loss, you cannot have a baby without the risk of it not coming out healthy or sometimes you not being alive to see it,
… or love without the risk of getting hurt … No, everything is not as morbid as it probably is sounding here, but these are the facts of life on earth, which each of us has to deal with at some point, and sometimes with more than a pinch of salt.
But this thing about love, is something that has been bothering me and seriously making me angry and restless for a very long time.
Why is it that the heart desires what is can’t have? When someone loves you, you end up asking yourself, why?.. Is it my money? My persona? My success?
Or even worse; you question that silly one that loves you? Their reasons.. Is it their insecurity? Their own incompleteness? Their need for attachment?
Did you ever ask your parents why they love you? Did you ask them why do they call you so much? Why they want you to be in front of their eyes as much as you can? Do they ever ask you why you want from them all the time? If are you with them because you feel incomplete or haven’t yet succeeded? Or why do you put your head in your mothers’ lap cry… are you that insecure?
Love for a person not of the same blood can be like that too. Is it not? Otherwise why would you create a child with such a person? Imagine your child asking you, “so you gave me birth because you felt incomplete without me?” the answer is no, and yes. No, because the child wasn’t even there for you to feel incomplete without it and yes, because you feel complete in a marriage once your beautiful child arrives, and then just like that, in one moment, you feel like it was always there, even before you possibly. Isn’t that incredible? Brings a smile to your face, but not funny, I say!
Going back to what I wanted to talk to you about (I tend to get carried away), love (just one of the emotions I get carried away with), is something of such beauty and simplicity and yet so complicated that we spend all our lives looking for answers we, more often, do not find and end up feeling dejected and miserable. Oh my God, we reach out for books to teach us how to, how much to and when to love or not!
We have all been in love, been stupid, gotten carried away, given it our all, been used, cheated, betrayed, have lost, suffered loneliness, fallen in love again, but we never cease to put up this brave front. We try so hard to appear ‘in control’ of our feelings, playing hard to get, be unavailable, run away from the one who loves us truly because we feel overwhelmed, fill our life and time with other things (you do realize they are still ‘other’ things, test that silly wide eyed one’s love for us over and over again, trying to convince them that it’s not really love just some attraction, some attachment…
And all why? Because they were honest enough to tell you how they feel? Brave enough to care how you’d react and still not care enough that it will change how they feel? Running the risk of being accused of wearing their heart on their sleeve because they’ve loved before? … As if you haven’t.
When all we really want is for someone to love us warts and all, and someone we can hold, feel safe enough to be held by, someone we can cry and laugh with, fight and make up with, think and decide with, fail and succeed with, sleep and wake up with, isn’t it?
Love is not to be measured, not to be compared, it doesn’t have reason, it doesn’t come with an expiry date. Unfortunately the human body of the person, who loves you, does.
I see everyone looking for this sort of or that sort of a person. I do too. My sort has to be the sharing, loving, caring, trusting, honest and silly sort. What is your sort?
Why judge a person’s love for you by their achievements and accomplishments? You mean to tell me that a person successful in their job is sure to make a successful companion? Or just because I don’t have time for love, as a result, time for you, as much I have time for other things it means I’m the one who’s truly desirable?
So you love the one who doesn’t love you. You want the one, who doesn’t want you. You need the one who doesn’t need you.
Whatever happened to just loving… and being loved? Showering your special one with attention without having to be answerable for it? Telling someone you love them without having a long list of logical and practical reasons for it?
Why does that person need you to become this or that before you can be part of their life, and then when you do try to do that they ask you why you want to do this for them (with such wonder… as if they don’t know) and then ask you to do it for yourself (so that their guilt is less), Haha! And even so, it is not even close to enough.
I’m not here to have a mudslinging game. We are all; the ones in love, the one’s running away from it, the ones running after it, and even the ones pretending that it doesn’t exist or even if it does, it can’t be the most important thing in life; wasting our intelligence, our emotions and our time.
Love is the one and single most important thing in life. It is the most beautiful emotion. It is to be given and received and returned with more so that even more comes back to you. So that you may, while you are on this lovely planet, create and share incredible experiences the warmth of which the entire world can feel.
Just love… I promise you, not that difficult…
P.S.: if you think I’m wrong, go soak your head… ;) kidding...
If you think I’m lecturing, I hope you learn something from it…
If you think I’m being repetitive, continue the trend… read this 10 times a day, you’ll believe it.
If you hear any honesty in it, just smile and allow it to sink in.
P.P.S: I love you.
